Matty Boy

Dear Col,

I was leafing through the reading material at the grocery store checkout line, when I saw your picture in Star magazine. You are apparently being romantically linked to Matthew Perry.

Care to comment?

-Nosy in New Jersey


Dear Nosy in New Jersey,

Well you see I'm a big shot at the Warner Brothers Studio. As an intern I have loads of power. In fact I was the one who gave Aaron Sorkin the idea for West Wing and then he screwed me over claiming it as his own. Jerk. So since it was MY show, I decided to show up to the final taping of the show on Friday night. I chilled with my homes Marty Sheen and Allison J.

Now Aaron is working on this new show called Studio 60 a show about the behind the scenes of an SNL type show. You would think this was my idea but you are wrong. I only helped to finance it. So they are filming the pilot now and as I was kicking it with my crew Aaron stopped by with Mathew Perry (who is in Studio 60). Silly ol' Matt jokingly went to steal a prop from the set when I blocked his way. He couldn't resist how amazingly good looking I am and decided to ask me on a date.

The funniest part is that we have been dating for about a year now so he was just being cute. So yeah it's true. We are dating. And despite him being loaded I usually pay for things when we go out and then just steal the money back from him later when he's not looking.